Car Trips Can Be Helpful

So, I went on a two week road trip with my husband. This blog isn't about what we saw on our trip, but rather, how God used it to change my heart.
Before we left, I had been struggling greatly with depression. When things go wrong I tend to draw inward and take it out on myself. I have been this way for as long as I can remember.
I was angry with God. I thought that it would just be so easy for Him to help me out, to change circumstances with Ben and I, with my family, and with my own personal struggles. I felt as though my prayers were being ignored. I stopped praying. It was hurting me to pray.
Well, about the time we got to D.C., feelings just all started pouring out. I cried at how magnificent everything was, but I think I also cried for a greater reason. As I was seeing things that I've wanted to visit for so long, something clicked. I said " Oh, I get it. I finally get it". I'm young. I'm 24. I got to go on a trip that would not have been possible with a crying baby in the back seat. Throughout the trip, I found myself leaving all of my problems from home where they were. I spent two weeks enjoying the present, actually having conversations with Ben, and being thankful that it was just the two of us. Towards the end of the trip, Ben and I made some decisions together that we may not have made had we stayed at home. I think God wanted us to get away from everything so that we could get a clearer idea of what He wants from us as a couple.
I feared that once I got back home, my sadness would return. But guess what? I'm okay! I honestly can say that I am finally alright if Ben and I don't get to have a child any time soon. I have so much that I can do as a woman without children. If God decides to bless us, fine. But if not, I really think I'll be okay.